Pittsburgh Dad

August 21, 2024

Okay, I spend a lot of time these days conversing with AI chatbots. I get paid a few bucks to do so, which is nice, but the endeavor has me living in my head a lot (too much?). This job has me developing thoughts and feelings about an amazing range of topics that I never would have thought were worthy of my time or energy. Some of the discussions relate to politics, culture, social interactions, advanced theories and analysis, silly creative writing, and a boatload of other areas that are sometimes enervating, sometimes frustrating, sometimes dull, and sometimes outright riveting.

One thing I’ve come to realize is that the exercise has me pondering life more than ever before. I don’t know if that’s the reason I also find myself being many levels more sentimental than I ever remember. (Of course, it could be that I’m finally realizing how old I am. Who knows? Then again, I am someone who admits to getting misty-eyed watching a sappy Budweiser Super Bowl commercial or this old  McDonald’s commercial, so maybe I just have an overactive empathy gene?)

Anyway, that is my long-winded way of introducing a song I heard today for the first time. Its simplicity and sincerity hit me harder than most songs ever have. It’s called Dear Winter, by AJR, an Indie Alternative trio of brothers from New York. The song’s writer, Ryan (the band’s bassist) says he wrote it “in a very dark, kinda sad time in my life.” He tells a story about the first time he played it for his brother Jack (the band’s primary vocalist) on a piano in their apartment. His back was turned as he played and sang, and he was stunned when he finished and turned around to find his brother red-faced and sobbing.

Yeah, it did that to me, too.

Here are the lyrics:

Dear Winter, I hope you like your name

I hope they don’t make fun of you
When you grow up and go to school, okay?

‘Cause Winter is a badass name

Dear Winter, I hope you talk to girls

Or boys or anyone you like
I just hope you don’t stay in every night

‘Cause I wish I was out tonight

It really doesn’t seem like there’s anyone for me

But dear Winter, I hope you like your name
I’m hoping that someday, I can meet you on this earth

But shit, I gotta meet your mom first

Dear Winter, I hope you like this song

And even when you’re thirteen
And you scream at me for parenting you wrong

I hope it’s still a badass song

It really doesn’t seem like there’s anyone for me

But dear Winter, I hope you like your name
You know I cannot wait to teach you how to curse

But shit, I gotta meet your mom first

Dear Winter, don’t move too far away

And please don’t say I’m hovering
When I text you to ask about your day

I wanna hear about your day

Will we still hang out and talk
When I’m no longer in charge

Oh, dear Winter, I hope you like your name
I hope you let me take a shot with you on your 21st

But shit, you gotta ask your mom first

Dear Winter, I’m looking for your mom

I gotta find a girl that doesn’t mind

That I’m inside my head a lot
Winter, it won’t be too long

First, I just gotta find your mom

I got married late in life (or so I was told — I was 39). I always thought I wanted to be a parent but there were many days (years?) when I thought that day would never come. (I’m forever grateful that opportunity came, and my life is now graced with two talented, beautiful, creative, and unbelievably smart daughters!) This song reminds me of the times when I had given up hope that I’d ever be a dad.

It’s so simple and touching, and when he sings: “It really doesn’t seem like there’s anyone for me…” and then punctuates it with the hilarious roundhouse-punch line: “But shit, I gotta meet your mom first,” I laughed and then cried.

Such an easy tune, too… and the way Jack’s voice quivers and yet soars in each chorus… just great (badass!) songwriting and deft performance! Take a listen: